Words

I recently had an interview with the Pentagon Channel to discuss my experiences with the Workforce Recruitment Program for College Students with Disabilities. It was a wonderful opportunity and I'm so grateful to be able to spread the word about the WRP and the opportunity it provides for students with disabilities to be exposed to the federal government workforce. I was lucky enough to land this interview because someone from the Pentagon Office of Public Affairs had seen me participating in another documentary and tracked me down to ask for my time.

I had to let my boss know about the interview obviously, because it was during work hours, so about a month ago, I walked into her office and let her know that the Pentagon Channel wanted to interview me. There were a few people standing in her office when I approached the door. I had to get back to the Reporter within the hour, so I stuck my head in the doorway and let her know. She was fine with it; she just asked me to put the interview on the calendar once it was scheduled.

As I was walking out the door, a co-worker followed me. Our exchange was is below:

Co-worker: "You know they're only interviewing you because you have a disability, right?"

Me: "Well, yes, in a sense. It would be silly to interview someone who doesn't have a disability about their experience in a program for students with disabilities."

Co-worker: "Well, what I mean is... they are not interviewing me because I don't have [a disability]."

Me: "Huh?" (befuddled look)

Co-worker: "They're only interviewing you because you have a disability. They are not interviewing you because of any skills or knowledge you might possess. I'm just putting that on the table."

Me: "I don't know that that is true, but even so, what does it matter? If I can present a positive, articulate image of federal employees with disabilities, maybe I can change an attitude or two."

Co-worker: "Well, I understand it doesn't matter to you how you get your foot in the door, but you know me, I'm just telling you the truth."

Conversations like the one above are one reason why I need a new job. It's hard to work around people who don't think about what they say, or think too little about what they say, in a field centered around words and the perception of them. Let's face it; most basic discrimination cases involve a breakdown in communication where, at some point, the words exchanged between two parties either lost all meaning or found new meaning within the mind of the speaker or listener. It's important, especially in a workplace, to think about what we say and how we say it. I'm not saying that we should walk on eggshells and worry every second how someone might perceive a "Hello" or a "Good Morning," but we should at least make sure that everything we say has a purpose, and that we know what the purpose of our statements are before they grace our lips.

What was the point of the exchange above? What did my co-worker hope to achieve by saying those things? If her goal was to make me feel a little crappy, she succeeded. Not enough to make me run away crying... but still. What other effects could those words have had? What was their point? As professionals, we really need to ask ourselves these questions from time to time.

Case and point: Yesterday, I was talking to the office Director about what she did over the holiday and she told me that she played a game her friend calls "autistic scrabble" over the weekend. Imagine me, again with the befuddled look.

"Well," she said, "it's a game where everyone has her own set of tiles and works alone to use all of them and the quickest."

Me: "Why are you calling it "autistic scrabble" again?"

Director: "Well, because you know, autistic people like to do everything by themselves."

Three things:

1. Apparently she doesn't know Matthew Hunt, or hasn't read anything by Temple Grandin, or John Elder Robinson.

2. It's never a good idea to make a generalization about all people with a certain disability. She should know that as the Director of an EEO office. And they are people first. People, who have autism.

3. If it's a joke, it wasn't that funny. I didn't laugh.

My family and friends joke and laugh with my brother about his traits that are a part of his autism, but we love them and him, and wouldn't want it any other way. We all have our quirks.

But to make a blanket generalization, that is in a sense making fun of all people with a certain disability is nowhere near the same. I'm not sure why she thought that would be funny to me... maybe because my brother has autism. Maybe because I have a disability.

Yeah.

Not so much.