Let me take a selfie....

Imagine that the man (or woman) you love more than life itself has just proposed to you. You're lying there in their arms, planning your future and building your life together, piece by piece. You gaze lovingly into their eyes and they say: "I think I'm finally ok with the way you look now."

Or imagine that you are lying completely nude with your husband or wife. You look up at them to say, "I love you." They tap your rearend and say, "You could really use some work down here."

Or imagine you're with your significant other and you're not feeling particularly attractive that day. Being as they are your best friend, you confide in them that you are not feeling very attractive. "I'm really feeling like a solid 4 out of 10, " you say. 

They say, "Nah, I'd say a 7."

Or imagine that you are considering dating someone. You've gotten red flags to indicate to you that maybe this person doesn't think you're all that attractive. They laud the beauty of others on social media in front of you, but never say a thing to or about you unless prompted. They have admitted to you that they're afraid to show someone your pictures because while they find you attractive in some of them, others make them cringe. And it has become such an issue for this person that they must have a conversation to address it with you. 

What should you do?

My thoughts are these: 

1. You should be with someone who makes you feel like a 10 + everyday. Someone who sees your beauty for what it is and who doesn't care what others think, because they know you are the total package. 

2. You should be with someone who addresses you in love; who is careful of your feelings; and whose concern about your appearance is rooted in your health needs and not in any selfish concern they have for themselves. 

3. You should be with someone who sees the beauty in your heart first. That is so cliche. But trust me on this. The heart is always what is most or least attractive. In 50 years, my friends, we'll all have saggy butts and take wrinkly selfies. What will matter more is that we're still able to give, able to serve, and able to love one another.